a great weekend. :)

This has been a very restful weekend. Playing Pokemon, catching up with some of my favourite TV shows. Scorpion seems like a nice premise for a show, it'll be interesting to see how the network runs with it. It has got antisocial geniuses and the normal people who love them, hacking (granted, Hollywood hacking) and Homeland Security.

After the madness of the past two months for the exams, this has been something I really needed.

I caught myself thinking, just the other day, if I could live like this, I could. Hot mug of tea in my hands, grandmother's cooking in the kitchen, great music streaming on Spotify, on my bed with a mountain of blankets and the rain pouring outside. 

I remember applying for a job at Buffer a couple years ago and though I didn't get the job, their company message stayed with me. One of the points on the slide was to choose happiness no matter what. It has been very helpful for me to remember that happiness is a choice. 

我好累。我不知道这无名的疲惫是不是即将结束的考试季节说带来的后遗症。

变质的友谊单方面的维持也很累。四年前我决定结束随时踩到地雷的生活,想不到会又碰到。

单方面的讨好好累,处处提防自己的言行举止也好累。明明没做错什么却感到愧疚也好累。一个和谐的圈子里出现了一个蛮不讲理的人让我好累。

Perhaps you could call these the years in which I have finally figured my shit out and where I want to go. All my life I've been searching for a period of time where I can just relax and not have anything to worry about but we both know that it isn't going to happen. No matter how well adjusted you like to say you are, there will be nagging thought at the back of your mind, waiting for the moment before wakefulness and slumber to pounce, leaving you tired but insomniac.

I guess the most important thing I've learnt over the past year is that how you handle it when things don't go your way matters more than whether or not everything does. And let's face it, no one gets their way all the time.

We have to make the best of what we have. 

PLANS: Solo Birthday Trip in April

I know it's ambitious. I have not had the resources to be a well-travelled person nor have I ever travelled alone. I can't stop thinking about it though. I have always thought that with my current resources going out of the country is impossible for me, but when I actually sat down to work out the numbers, it seems like it is actually a real possibility.

Nobody knows what would happen to me tomorrow and I really don't want to leave with any regrets. 

Saturday

Just spent almost the entire day tinkering with my old MacBook Pro and installing Yosemite. Backed up all my photos and ended up reminiscing at times gone by. Managed to get an error during the first install and had to do it again and again. Four weeks away to my finals and I am still not doing much, apparently.